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How to Find "the One" without dating a million people first

The Christian dating world can be a daunting place. With so many options and so much pressure to find "the one," it's no wonder that many people go on dozens of first dates before finding a long-term partner. However, there is another way. Instead of going on date after date in the hopes of eventually stumbling upon the right person, here’s how to find “the one” sooner rather than later.



Know What You Want in a Partner

And don’t date people who lack in critical areas.

Before you start dating, spend some time thinking about what you’re looking for in a partner and the type of relationship you want to build. Consider the “non-negotiables,” such as their values and beliefs and anything else that is super important to you. Once you have a clear idea of who and what you’re looking for, you can narrow your search and only pursue relationships with people who meet your standards and needs.

Be Friends First

And only pursue a romantic relationship with someone you can see a future with.

Rather than dating multiple people in hopes of finding “the one,” you can be friends first and avoid dating tons of people. By building a friendship with someone, you get to learn about them and consider whether they are someone you’re interested in romantically. Just be sure to make your intentions clear–that you’re not looking for a relationship but are open to getting to know someone and building a friendship to see if it leads to more.

Be Honest with Yourself

And don’t stay in a relationship that isn’t going anywhere.

You might not want to have to date a lot of people to find the right person for you. However, it’s better to end a relationship that isn’t working than stay in it because you don’t want to have to go on first dates again. If your goal is to find “the one”–the person you want to be with forever–don’t waste time pursuing relationships that just aren’t it. The sooner you end a relationship that isn’t going anywhere, the sooner you’ll be able to start a relationship that’s going exactly where you want it to go.


By taking a more targeted approach to how to find “the one,” you can save yourself a lot of time and energy—not to mention heartache. And who knows? With this approach, you just might find the love of your life on your first date!


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