Breakups aren’t fun, whether you were with someone for a few months or a few years. Nevertheless, they happen. And when they do, it can be hard to prepare your heart and mind to find love again. You need to make sure you’re ready to start dating and not set yourself up for disappointment. Here are five ways to do that.
1. Don’t Rush–Take Time to Heal
Whether it was a good relationship or a terrible breakup, you need space to heal and recover mentally and emotionally. This takes time, and there’s no reason to rush it. The last thing you want is to start dating someone new before you’re really ready to date well. So, don't rush into another relationship just because you feel lonely. Spend time with friends and family, read Bible verses for encouragement, and do things that make you happy.
2. Reflect on the Experience
Every relationship, good or bad, provides an opportunity to learn something. So, take time to reflect on what went wrong in your previous relationship. It may help you avoid a painful experience in your next one. But also consider some of the things that were great. Now you know some of the things you definitely want in a partnership, which can help you connect with people who are a better match for you.
3. Test the Waters before Diving In
When you feel like you’re ready to start dating again, take things slow. Don't try to jump into another serious relationship right away. Start with casual dates and see how things go. You might not be prepared for the emotions and feelings that arise when you start dating after a breakup. Give yourself space to process and work through those feelings without the pressure of a serious relationship.
4. Don’t Compare New People to Your Ex
It can be hard not to compare a past relationship with a potential one, but it’s important to keep your ex out of your dating life. Bringing them up in conversation or comparing someone to your ex will keep you from moving on, and it isn’t fair to the new people you meet. Try to get to know people for who they are without seeing if they measure up to what you once had.
5. Be Realistic with Your Expectations
It’s good to have a positive attitude about getting back into the dating game after breaking up with your ex. However, make sure you’re giving yourself (and others) realistic expectations. While there’s a chance the next person you swipe right on will be your “forever” person, you might not find love right away. And that’s okay! Try to enjoy being single while opening up your heart again.