5 Signs of an Unhealthy Friendship (And What To Do About It)

Friendships are supposed to be life-giving — that’s why God designed them. But what happens when a friendship starts feeling more like a heavy weight than a blessing? Sometimes, we stay in unhealthy friendships without even realizing it. Don’t worry, though — we’re going to unpack five key signs of an unhealthy friendship and what you can do to turn things around.

1. There’s a Lot of Drama

If your friendship feels like a soap opera, it might be time to pause and reflect. Constant fights, passive-aggressive comments, or emotional rollercoasters aren’t normal. Proverbs 15:18 says, “A hot-tempered person stirs up conflict, but the one who is patient calms a quarrel.” Friendships should feel peaceful, not stressful.

What You Can Do:

• Stay calm during conflicts, and pray for wisdom.

• Set boundaries to avoid unnecessary drama.

• Address issues openly, but with love.

2. They Bring out the Worst in You

Do you find yourself lying, gossiping, or making poor choices when you’re around this friend? That’s a red flag. A healthy friendship encourages you to be more like Jesus, not less. 1 Corinthians 15:33 warns, “Bad company corrupts good character.”

What You Can Do:

• Be honest with yourself about how this friendship affects you.

• Limit the time spent with people who lead you astray.

• Ask God for the strength to stay true to your values.

3. There’s No Room for Trust

Trust is the foundation of a healthy friendship. If your friend shares your secrets, breaks promises, or makes you feel like you can’t rely on them, things aren’t in a good place. Proverbs 11:13 tells us, “A gossip betrays a confidence, but a trustworthy person keeps a secret.”

What You Can Do:

• Communicate how broken trust hurts you.

• Watch for consistent actions, not just apologies.

• Decide if the friendship is worth rebuilding.

4. It Feels One-Sided

A friendship needs balance. If you're constantly giving without receiving care or effort in return, it can cause burnout. Galatians 6:2 says to “carry each other’s burdens,” but that doesn’t mean you should do all the heavy lifting alone.

What You Can Do:

• Talk to your friend about what you need.

• Create space for relationships that are mutual.

• Focus on God’s love to fill your heart.

5. You’re Not Growing Spiritually

A Christ-centered friendship should inspire you to grow in faith. If your connection distracts you from God or leads you away from Him, that’s a problem. Hebrews 10:24 says, “And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds.”

What You Can Do:

• Invite your friend to do spiritual activities together, like Bible study or prayer.

• Share about what God is teaching you.

• Be willing to step back if the friendship pulls you away from Him.

Friendships aren’t always easy, but with God’s help, you can make changes and grow. Pray about your relationships and trust Him to guide you. With a little grace and wisdom, you can move toward healthier, more life-giving connections.