One-Sided Friendships Suck: Here's What To Do About It

We all know that the best friendships go two ways. But sometimes, it feels like you’re the one doing all the texting, planning, and caring while your friend is just... there. It’s exhausting, right? If you’ve ever felt like you’re carrying the weight of a friendship all by yourself, you’re not alone. The good news? You don’t have to stay stuck in the draining cycle of a one-sided friendship. Here’s what to do about it. 

Signs You’re in a One-Sided Friendship

First, let’s figure out if this is what’s happening. Here are some telltale signs:

• You’re always the one reaching out first.

• They cancel plans more often than they keep them.

• They only talk about themselves and rarely ask how you’re doing.

• You feel emotionally drained after spending time with them.

If you’re nodding along, it might be time to take a closer look at this friendship.

What Does the Bible Say About Friendship?

God designed friendships to be life-giving, not life-draining. Proverbs 17:17 says, “A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for a time of adversity.” True friends show up for you, not just when it’s convenient for them. Jesus Himself modeled sacrificial love in friendships, saying, “Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends” (John 15:13). If your friendship doesn’t reflect this kind of mutual care, it’s okay to take a break and re-evaluate.

What Can You Do About It?

This is the big question… What do you do when you realize your friendship is one-sided? Here are some steps to take:

• Pray for Wisdom: Ask God for guidance. James 1:5 reminds us, “If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.” Pray for clarity and the right words to say.

• Have an Honest Conversation: Sometimes, people don’t realize how their actions (or lack of actions) affect you. Gently share how you’re feeling. Use “I” statements like, “I feel hurt when I’m always the one reaching out.”

• Set Healthy Boundaries: If the friendship doesn’t change, it’s okay to step back. Boundaries aren’t unkind — they’re necessary for your emotional and spiritual health.

• Focus on Life-Giving Relationships: Invest in friendships that uplift and encourage you. Surround yourself with people who reflect Christ’s love.

Remember, the right friendships will feel like a blessing (even in the hard times), not a burden.

You Deserve a Friendship That Goes Both Ways

Friendships are a gift from God, meant to bring joy and support into your life. If a one-sided friendship is leaving you feeling empty, it’s okay to let go or take a step back. Trust that God will bring the right people into your life — friends who love you as much as you love them.