Does Your Happiness Depend on Your Relationship Status?

Have you ever caught yourself feeling low when you’re single or overly secure when you're in a relationship? It’s easy to tie your happiness to your relationship status without even realizing it. But is that the way it’s supposed to be? Spoiler alert — it’s not. Here’s how to tell if your joy is tangled up in your relationship status, why that’s an issue, and how to refocus on what really matters.

Signs Your Happiness Might Be Tied To Being "Taken"

Not sure if this applies to you? Here are a few clues to watch for:

• Your mood depends on your relationship. You feel amazing when dating someone, but empty or unworthy when single.  

• You obsess over having a boyfriend or girlfriend. Being in a relationship is on your mind constantly, and you feel incomplete without one.  

• Jealousy strikes easily. Seeing other couples in relationships makes you feel less-than or even bitter.  

• You settle for less. You’d rather be in any relationship — even an unhealthy one — than alone.  

It happens so subtly that you might not even notice. But these patterns show something important: that you’re putting your joy in something that doesn’t last forever.

Why This Can Be a Problem  

When you invest your happiness in something temporary, like a relationship, you’re building on shaky ground. People, even the ones you care about most, are human. They can’t carry a weight that big.

The Bible reminds us of this. Psalm 118:8 says, “It is better to take refuge in the Lord than to trust in humans.” God designed you to find your foundation in Him, not in someone else. When you look to a relationship to define your worth or joy, it’s like asking a sandcastle to stand through a storm — it won’t hold.

What To Do Instead

The good news is, you can shift where you find your happiness. Here’s how to start:

• Learn to love this season. Whether single or in a relationship, ask what God wants to teach you right now. Ecclesiastes 3:1 says, “There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens.” There is always a lesson to be learned. 

• Deepen your relationship with God. Spend time in prayer and scripture, building an unshakable foundation in the One who never changes. (After all, He is the only true and lasting source of joy!) 

• Focus on gratitude. No matter your relationship status, there’s always something to be thankful for. Gratitude shifts your perspective.  

• Invest in other relationships. Friend and family connections bring joy and remind you that love comes in many forms. Now might be the best time to focus on building healthy friendships to support you when you do get in a relationship. 

Your relationship status doesn’t define you, and it shouldn’t dictate your happiness. When you root your joy in God instead of people, you’ll find a peace that lasts in every season.