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Preparing to Pop the Question: What to Do Before Getting Engaged

When you're preparing to ask the love of your life to marry you, the anticipation can be overwhelming. You want everything to be perfect and for the moment to be unforgettable. But before you get down on one knee, make sure you cross these 5 things off your to-do list.

1. Pray About It

First and foremost, pray about your decision. Getting engaged is the first step toward one of the most significant commitments you’ll make. Ask God if this is the right time and the right person. Seek His guidance in your decision-making process. James 1:5 says, “If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.”

This is particularly applicable when making such a life-altering decision as popping the question. Prayer helps to discern whether this commitment is the right step for both of you. It is also an opportunity to invite God into your relationship, laying a solid foundation for your marriage.

2. Share Your Plan with People You Trust

Seek counsel from individuals you trust and respect. For example, your pastor can provide wise advice based on their experiences and spiritual insight. They can help guide you through this exciting yet daunting process. Proverbs 15:22 says, “Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed.”

Also, consider talking to married couples within your church community. They have walked this path before and can provide practical advice. Their experiences can shine a light on what lies ahead and how to navigate potential challenges.

3. Ask for Her Father’s Permission

While it may seem old-fashioned, asking for your girlfriend’s father's permission is still a respectful gesture. It shows respect for her family and acknowledges the significant role they've played in her life. It also demonstrates your commitment and seriousness about the relationship.

Of course, every family dynamic is different. If asking her father isn't appropriate due to certain circumstances, consider asking someone else significant in her life–her mother, grandparent, or sibling.

4. Understand Each Other's Expectations

Before you propose, make sure you both clearly understand each other's expectations for marriage. Discuss important aspects like finances, children, career aspirations, and roles within the marriage. This conversation ensures you're both on the same page and can prevent misunderstandings down the line. It will also give you a glimpse of what life together might look like.

5. Plan a Meaningful Proposal

Finally, plan a proposal that is meaningful for both of you. It doesn't have to be extravagant, but it should be thoughtful. Here are some ideas to get your creative juices flowing:

  1. Choose a meaningful location: Consider proposing in a place that holds special significance for both of you, such as where you had your first date or a favorite vacation destination.

  2. Plan a surprise proposal: Surprise your partner by organizing a special event or outing, like a romantic picnic in the park or a candlelit dinner at home. The element of surprise adds excitement and makes the proposal more memorable.

  3. Get creative with the proposal idea: Think outside the box and come up with a unique proposal idea that reflects your relationship or shared interests. It could be a scavenger hunt leading to the ring, a flash mob, or a personalized video message.

  4. Involve family and friends: If your partner is close to their family and friends, consider involving them in the proposal. It could be as simple as having loved ones nearby to witness the special moment or planning a surprise gathering after the proposal.

  5. Incorporate sentimental elements: Include elements that hold sentimental value, such as incorporating a favorite song, reading a heartfelt letter, or gifting something meaningful along with the ring.

  6. Hire a professional photographer or videographer: Capture the proposal moment by hiring a professional photographer or videographer. This way, you can relive and share the special moment with friends and family.

  7. Write a heartfelt proposal speech: Take the time to prepare a sincere speech expressing your love and commitment. Personalize it with anecdotes, memories, and future dreams together.

You’ve got this!



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